Picture Of The Day

It must be noted that this crew of superstars get ultra-heavy awesome points for having the word "Boss" in their name. But I still have to get them. Clockwise, starting from the far left:

Labels: She's eyeballing that skylight as a possible escape hatch. Now's her chance while the boys aren't looking.

Another Tokusatsu WTF Moment

Tokusatsu..I can't fucking get enough of the stuff. The more recent stuff seems to be all Power Rangers type shows..but I personally prefer the older craptacular-giant-shitty-robots-from-the-70's style of program. Some of the old Toku classics are so awful that they go all the way around the back side of awful and actually transform into awesome. And if there's one thing Tokusatsu has plenty of, it's strangeness.

Check out this uber-weird FTW zen moment from an episode of "Fiveman" where instead of fighting in a traditional manner, the robots and monsters decide to "sing" each other into submission. What a brilliant and strange idea. Give me a team with Hanna Montana and the Jonas brothers and I'll raise the dead, make their ears explode, and kill them all over again.

Labels: Hey Japan, you are a fucking weirdo.

Got Chairs?

As demonstrated on numerous occasions on this blog by the insightful commentary of Matty and Kid Dammit, wrestling fans are fucking die hard. Watch as this over-zealous audience gives these wrestlers exactly what they ask for.. and then some.

(via Break)

(...and on a related note...It's still real to me, Dammit!)

Labels: herecomethepain

Chiru is my drug of choice

No one can resist his power. Be it man, woman, child, man-child, sasquatch, alien, or robot. His gem studded jackets are made of shiny materialials obtained from parts unknown. His mustache makes Tom Selleck pee inside his Hawaiian capri pants with it's potent masculine power and implied authority. His disco lights are filled with something hypnotic that makes my mind feel like Hal 9000's when that astronaut guy pulls all his chips out. Le's face it. He's pretty great.

Labels: That set towards the end of the video looks like the inside of a UFO

Star Wars Vs. Rush Hour

Thank you, giant robot overlord of the internet for blessing unemployed nerds with G4's and Final Cut Pro. Check out this sweet mashup of the Lando ROTJ scene with that totally Boss fish face guy mixed with a scene from "Rush Hour". This is best work Chris Tucker, Jackie Chan, or Billy Dee Williams have done in light years.

(via Unique Daily)

Labels: I wonder if the fish guy and Admiral Akbar were boys seeing as they both were like half fish

Log Cabin Vacation Fail

Labels: In the woods no one hears it when your family laughs at you

Jammin' on the One

I'm The Goddamn Batman

Labels: I would fight a giant scorpion to see the Dark Knight instead of going to work today

I Heart Computer.

Ay yay yay..this summer is making life crazy topsy-turvy bananas. I'm just super busy, I guess. Which is weird. And life is suddenly full of crossroads and choices my small brain isn't equipped to process. Oh, the drama. I feel like an uber-douche from my own personal version of "The Hills". Except unlike Spencer Pratt, God doesn't hate me and wish I'd fall off a Malibu cliff to be eaten by sand sharks. I wish the doppelganger I created of myself would do the fucking job I pay him to do and blog like a good doppelganger ought to. But no. Instead he just stays in and uses up electricity, running the air conditioning and playing my godamned Xbox while I'm out working like a hooker during Fleet Week. I suppose that's exactly what I'd do, so he is actually a fairly effective doppelganger. Damn you, science. If you weren't wearing those smart person glasses I'd slap that hyper-intelligent face of yours.

So here's some randomness I've enjoyed recently..please forgive the slowness of the posts lately. This blog moves like I dance. In random bursts of disjointed nonsense.

Everything you need to know about Judo in 30 seconds:

The Vader crew rocking the fresh Mike Jackson moves:

Joe Pesci as a foreign bike saleman:

A large group of over-caffeinated white people that should be crushed up into powder and smoked for energy:

Best new reason for having a baby:



Pumpers need to pump pump

Top notch douchebag of the new millennium

Send Barack your baby

I am neurotic

Mini Michael Jackson:



Bruce Lee, Rave Jedi:



The perfect gift for your God-loving 12-year-old Commie nephew:



And here are some of my suggestions for the future leaders of the country:

President: O-Breezy



VP: Al Geezy



Secretary Of Defense:




Secretary of Trans-Gender Relations and Mustaches:



Secretary of Posing:



Secretaries Of Sausage, Coins, and Pretzel Products:



Secretary of Horses:



Secretaries of Pirate Shirts, Hair, And European Relations:



And of course, my pick for Secretary Of Awesome:

More to come...if not, feel free to do this to me.



Take that, John Stamos.

(hat tips for the randomness boosted from JJ.am, myconfinedspace, Afrojacks, asylum, yayhooray, blort, pop.urls and katastrofalaomslag)

Labels: ah....blogohol...how sweet the taste

Stare into the Void

In the world of hacking the comics, there's a new game in town. Nietzsche Family Circus.



I wouldn't be surprised if there weren't literally a thousand ways to improve Family Circus.

Labels: comics

Picture of the Day

Labels: I don't like that way that supermarket is looking at me

Boom Karate

Michael Bay would require a Pinata full of Bolivian marching powder to be able to create something possessing this much unbridled awesome.

(via JJ.am)

Labels: I smell Oscar.

Go myself, It's your birthday

Aw, yeah.

Happy Birthday Recon

This birthday video was put together by someone for their friend April, but in the grand tradition of the internets in general, and Monkeys for Helping in particular, I'm just going to steal it and put Recon's name at the end instead (or I would if I was any good at video editing or computers or stealing things). So happy birthday from Joe Cocker and some dude named Jakepride (whose friend April didn't deserve this video tribute nearly as much as Recon!).

Super Stooges

I don't even care if this is an actual movie; the trailer alone is so awesome that it's giving me vertigo.

Labels: make way for the wonder women

Ummm...

Extras Season 3?

Picture Of The Day

This my friends, is Wayne Cochran. I read about him on PCL Link Dump. They call him the White King of Soul. And he's so fucking boss it's making my face hurt looking at him. Look at his hair. Seriously. Just look at it! It's the most amazing thing I've ever laid eyes on. It looks like fucking Hurricane Katrina. I feel like it could beat me in a fistfight. I can't even believe it doesn't have it's own name. It's like a monster with a man growing out if it. I could go on and on and on. If I was Wayne, I'd only write songs devoted to my own magnificent pompadour of oblivion. And there's no doubt in my mind that I'd cry myself to sleep at night hoping I could someday win its love. Move over Gary Spivey. There's a new king in town. Holleratyourboy.

Labels: This is what God's head must look like

James Brown and Little Richard on Wheel of Fortune

Check out the Godfather of Soul rocking out with Little Richard on The Wheel back in the day. Oh yeah, and Weird Al is also in the house. Can I get a W, T, and an F Pat? Those three could have made a wickedly strange album together. Weird Al aside, watch the dynamic duo break a sweat trying to solve clues that brine shrimp would find obvious. It's so jive that they put them on the same team. After watching them play you can see why. Golden legends of awesomeness? Yes. Good at the game of Kings? Hell fucking no.

Labels: Watching this is like entering a strange portal to another dimension

M.I.A. Paper Planes

By now this song is probably firmly embedded in your subconscious, but it's still the hottest song I've heard in a long time so I figured I'd post the video. And If you haven't heard it, enjoy. Certifiable dope shit. Can't shake it from my brain. It's like a virus. But good.

Labels: Some some some o dem I murder some a some I let go