Monday, May 31, 2010

Pig in Space

Pulp sci-fi cover art is the air-brushed van of book covers. I get the feeling that whoever made this cover was more interested in smelling the paint than in capturing the feel of the novel.

What we have here is actually the dream sequence from Happy Days as reimagineered by David Lynch. It's the part when Richie buys some bad meth from the Fonz and ends up spending some quality down time hallucinating on the floor of the shed behind the drive-in. I believe "Happy Daze" is the working title for the project.

Call me crazy but with a title like “The Interstellar Pig” I expect there to be at least one pig on the cover.

(via the tumblelog)

Monday, May 24, 2010

For a Pie

And here's yet another tip of the hat to football (ie. soccer) announcing.

Well done sir! I could hardly understand a word of it but like all great art, it spoke to my soul.

And how about Mr. BBC back in the studio coming back with the deadpan quip. Brilliant.

(via languagelog)

Monday, May 17, 2010

Lessons in Gender, part 83


A few weeks ago, my buddy El Jus picked me up in his nice SUV so we could escape the city for the day and go shooting shotguns up north. He parked near my place and I told him I had to pick up a "Panini" at my local food monger across the street before we left. He agreed, and we walked there.

I was hungry like the Wolf because I only ate beer the night before, and had eaten a steady diet of nothing since being awoken by a Saturday morning douche bag Reggaeton drive-by a few hours earlier, so my stomach made the executive decision to tell my brain to walk and eat at the same time. And I did just that.

So I ate my Italian Panini sandwich and we walked back to his nice SUV. But I was conscious of the fact that I wasn't eating with good manners because of my terrible hunger, and I didn't want to go all man-bear inside his car's sparkly leather interior, so I hastily finished my delicious European style sandwich outside the vehicle, simply out of respect. I could tell he wanted me to hurry up, but his passive aggressive eye rolling achieved nothing. When a person is so hungry they think like a forest pig scavenging the frozen earth in a Siberian white out it's hard to pick up on those things.

Luckily, I eat faster than lasers fuck, so I was done pretty quick.

So then I see this cop with a ticket book standing outside my friend's SUV. I was really nervous because I didn't want to be the reason my friend got a ticket, and I looked at the cop and was confused. You see they had their back to me, and all I saw was this boxy frame with a cop hat on top of it. I didn't know what it was. It was sunny out, I was tired, and time was now my enemy. But I had to say something. Big ticket=awkward drive+no fun for the rest of the day. So before I could think, I blurt out:

"Excuse me! Sir! Ma'am! Miss! Sir! Sir! Officer! Ma'am! Miss! Officer! We're here, sir! We're right here! Please!!"

Then the cop turned around, and the face had a mustache on it. And it was Crimson red.

"I'm a MAN," he said, and flipped his ticket book closed, and walked away.

My friend proceeded to call me an Asshat for the next 45 minutes.

Whatever. I may have been wrong about his gender, but I swear to you that man owned a pair of plusher than plush gams, and had the unmistakable shape of a sweet, sweet, lady. And if I learned anything from the timeless lyrics of Colombian singer/songwriter Shakira, the hips never lie.

Sunday, May 02, 2010

Podcast 5: Big Foot, Fast Fingers


More Bigfoot is on the way with podcast 5: The Bigfoot Hides Again.

Just so you know, the podcasts can be found at the M4H podcast blog at podbean. You can use the Podbean site to download or share any of the podcasts.
(Or you can subscribe via Itunes here.) And we're always excepting new emails at!