Sunday, April 29, 2007

Picture Of The Day


Well, at least they're half off.

All City: Poppin' And Lockin'


Don't ask me to explain, but more so than any other day, Sunday afternoon is all about fresh 80's breakdancing.

(via videosift)

Sick Freestyle Soccer Tricks


Watch these totally amazing soccer tricks...The one where the guy does the cool thing with the ball is my absolute favorite.

(special props to Carlos Valderama for his Gary Spivey meets Sideshow Bob wonderfro.)

(via Digg)

I Am 8-Bit

I Am 8-Bit is a series of video game inspired art pieces done by various artists...check out the available works gallery, some really cool stuff..I'm really digging Jeff McMillan's Mike Tyson's Punch Out series:

(click pic for gallery!)

(via Kotaku)

What You Know About Math?


What do I know about Math? Admittedly, not alot. But I know that mathletes plus parody multiplied by southern rap equals double plus awesome squared.

(via Neatorama)

Ghost Town Disco

I also consider the Bee Gees to be a cooler version of the Styx. I guess things just come in pairs with me.

Somebody really dropped the ball with this video. To be more accurate, they dropped the ball, left the stadium, and went home and made a sandwich that was completely unrelated to the game they were playing.

Wednesday, April 25, 2007

Hip to be Square

For some reason, I always think of Rockappella as a cool version of Huey Lewis and the News. Even though that makes no sense. No sense at all. Notice how they assemble like a middle age justice league once someone switches on the coffee pot. I Never thought about drinking coffee as an uproariously good time for the whole family before.

Tuesday, April 24, 2007

OMG!!! It's Bollywood Bigfoot!


As you can tell, my capitalization indicates profound levels of excitement. Sasquatch are just monkeys we haven't found yet, so what's not to love about them? And why not put one into a totally action-packed, budgetless Bollywood extravaganza?

This is alot like Ang Lee's Hulk except instead of being the most boring thing I've ever seen it's better than an explosion filled with rock and roll and ice cream.

Speaking of explosions...hey Indian probably shouldn't stand on top of that "highly explosive" gas tank, big guy. It might result in some kind of exciting finale.

(via Turbanhead)

The Year 2000..In Postcards..From 1900


Paleo-Future has some awesome postcards created at the turn of the century that depict what life might have been like in the year 2000. There are some gems in here, like underwater tourist boats and moving pavement. Here are some I enjoyed:

"Summers At The North Pole"


This one is clearly the most accurate, seeing as there are like 2 polar bears left. Why do you think all those blimp planes are there? I bet Al Gore is in one of them working on a power point.

"Weather Control Machine"


My personal favorite. But why anyone would set it to "Shitty" is beyond me.

"Roofed Cities"


Perfect for when the robots inevitably get their evil metal claws on the weather control machine.

Check out the whole collection HERE....

(via Boing Boing)

Real Life Gundam Suit


Everyone take note of the name: Yoshiyuki Sankai. He has created a technology that if used for evil could lead to some very anime-esque apocalypse scenarios. The Hybrid Assistive Limb (Hal) created at Tokyo university adds strength and power to the person using it. Also, (and more importantly) it allows the user to look like a total badass and destroy inferior humanoids with the merciless efficiency of a godless killer robot. Let's hope this Dr. Sankai is a nice guy. He wields the power to kill us all.

The Mysterious Flying Humanoids


I believe. I love all things paranormal. Any story that mentions reptilian overlords and underground joint alien/govt bases has me totally riveted. But this story has me totally dumbfounded. Apparently in Mexico people have been filming things in the sky that look like...people?!? Read story, and lots of interesting and strange pictures...


(click pic for story!)

(via Presurfer)

C2C At DMC '05


As a recovering scratchaholic, I've seen my fair share of DJ routines. That being said, these guys are so smooth it's ridiculous. C2C won the DMC group mixing award 3 years straight, and you can see why after watching this flawlessly tight, very jazzy set. I could watch this over and over again.

(via videosift)

Monday, April 23, 2007

Picture Of The Day


My face is burning.

(via Eatliver)

Chiranjeevi Does Axel F. I Can Now Die Happy.


Honestly, can Indian superstar Chiru do no wrong?
First he does Michael. Then he uses a horse as a stunt car. Now he takes on an all-time classic, Beverly Hills Cop's theme, "Axel F" and flips it with sequins, backup dancers that look like rodeo clowns, and unbelievably horribly awful breakdancing. 3 minutes and 52 seconds of pure bliss. If only the whole internet was this fantastically bosstastic. It feels so nice, good God..I wanna kiss myself.



Flying kites in India may be hazardous to your health.

Shinji Saito - Yo-Yo Jedi


Oh my. Watch as Mr. Saito brings the fucking ruckus at the 2006 yo-yo championships.. (which he totally ended up sonning..shocker, I know..)

(via Gorillamask)

Sunday, April 22, 2007

Arnold's Got Hoes...

If Ludacris wasn't preoccupied being so damn ludicrous, he'd probably be pretty proud of this. Check out this perfect addition to the already awesome Arnold YTMND collection of "Arnold Shares His Feelings" and "Inspector Kimball". I like it almost as much as my all time favorite.


(click pic for site!)

(via Reddit)

Saturday, April 21, 2007

Dan le Sac vs Scroobious Pip


I am really digging this song...Check out "Thou Shalt Always Kill"...The part about the bands is brilliant. Favorite line: "Thou shalt not wish your girlfriend was a freak like me." Fucking perfect.

(thanks Kuru!)

Cleanliness Is Next To Godliness


(via yayhooray)


South Park Real Life

The History and roots of all eletronic music

This is absolutely great!
Spend some time checking out the roots of MANY electronic musical
Tons of great examples of classic songs for each genre.
Not too sure about all the
sarcastic undertones of some of them...

Thursday, April 19, 2007

Picture Of The Day


Move over Glen. There's a new boss in town.

MasterHoff Theatre: Starcrash!


Hoff's man perm is working overtime in this spectacular clip from the Star Wars knockoff "Starcrash". Sure the spacesuits are Mork And Mindy, and the effects are Clash Of The Titans, but the pure awesome is off the fucking charts.

(via videosift)

Dolphins Are Suspect


Fuck Dolphins. Yes, I said it. I know they are super smart, can diffuse bombs, speak with sonar to each other, fight evil, and save babies from Tsunamis. I know they shoot lasers, do Sudoku, and play chess. I heard all that. Good for them. If they wore clothes I'd pin a medal on their slimy fish chests. That's all well and good. But it doesn't mean I have to like them.

I used to like them. I used to think they were like underwater fish robots that ruled the ocean with their advanced intelligence. Then I got up close to them and got a chance to gaze into their beady little eyes and see the truth: They are godless creatures from the hellish deeps.

It all started when my Dad and I went swimming with them back in the day in the Florida Keys. I thought it would be cool, but somehow it ended up terrifying me. I started panicking once I jumped into the water.

First of all, they are fucking huge. Huge and fast. They are fucking fast as ninjas. I felt like one could jump out of the water and bite my face off so quickly that no one could do anything about it. I felt defenseless. Swimming with 9 foot monsters cruising around your feet is totally unsettling.

Long story short, we got to hold hoops for them to jump through, and did a bunch of other cool crap I was too scared to enjoy. But what happened at the end is main the reason I don't trust them and never ever will again.

At the end, the trainers had my father and I get up on the dock and get on one knee for a "fun surprise" photo op. They asked us to lean over the water and the Dolphins would jump up and "kiss" us for the benefit of the camera.

My father did it, picture was taken, no harm done. All the trainers clapped, and my Dad told me to do it, it was "fun".

Then it was my turn. Now at this point I was already on the fence about these bastards. I had looked into their eyes and seen nothing but cold and calculated evil. So I didn't lean over enough.

Then the Dolphin jumped. And because I wasn't close enough, it punched me. Right in the motherfucking face.

Holding my sore jaw I vowed to never trust them again. And I never have.

So my friends, if you know what is good for you, stay out of the water. Dolphins are suspect. You heard it here first.

(pic via myconfinedspace)


Sorry to deflate everyone's fantasies but robots do not have sex. Even though they may say "booty booty" and look like they're doing something naughty, when push comes to shove, they're built in a factory.

Wayne Dalgish, I Wish To Clone You


Imagine my success at repelling intruders from my compound if I had 50 to 75 Dalgishes holding it down with their potent bo-staff skills. They would be way cooler than Oompa-Loompas. Fuck dancing, these little bastards would bo-staff the crap out of anyone who looked at them sideways. People might accuse me of being a pedophile keeping all those kids around, but after saying it they would face the swirling bo attacks of my killer clone army. Sure I'd have to keep them fueled with Ritalin and away from sugar cereal and muzzle them during non-fighting hours to keep the chatter down, but it would so be worth it.

This is 3 and half feet of living proof that after school karate classes at the local strip mall totally pay off.

(via Digg)

The Idiot's Guide To Extorting From Children


The Retro-Encabulator


I always say that science is a subject for robots and people smarter than me. Things that require explaining are better left to the grey matter set. The wee brains of the world (ie: me) are perfectly content with not understanding things. Suffice it to say, science and technology are always something that have totally baffled me. Yes, baffled. I've truly been a baffled bastard since I can remember remembering. Give me simple math and I'll show you a grown man cry.

This explanation of The Retro-Encabulator has more tech and science talk in it than all smarty science books in nerd university. My brain didn't understand this fantastical machine, but my heart tells me I fucking want one in my living room to protect me from unseen magic I can't possibly comprehend.

(via Videosift)

Get Off Mein Cape!


The boys over at Sweatervest (who I'm proud to say are real life, non-imaginary human friends) that rocked out in Bladin' The Edge have given us another gem. Captain Handsome and Dare Dude are just a couple of Uber-fun boy roommates just trying to get by in this crazy world.

Watch as they go through all the trials and tribulations one would come to expect from any superhero duo that live together. You know...fights, tears, fun, sadness, dancing, and of course, Herpes.

Sunday, April 15, 2007

Beer 2 Go

When I was in Shanghai I saw some pretty amazing things. I saw adults betting on kids fighting, little kids.. I kid (sorry) you not. It was very upsetting and surreal. I ate snow frog. It was good and tasted like almonds. And I saw services taken to another level.

Full disclose... I did not take this picture. :)

Thursday, April 12, 2007

Picture Of The Day


His force powers include bad attitude, jewelry, razzing, not flying, and bitch slapping Italian Stallions.

Ninja Terminator


This trailer made me remember why I spent so much time as a kid drawing ninjas. What's not to love. They're it, and that's that. I used to play "The Legend of Kage" until my my frontal lobes began to cook. I saw this clip and heard a "Tha-pow!" which I realized was the sound of my own fist punching my own face spontaneously because my eyes saw something so cool and jazzy-awesome they were unworthy and deserved swift punishment. This movie has everything I could ever want in a movie. Ninjas that shoot fire, ninjas that jump and move at incredible speeds, terrible effects, people who look like Ozzy Osbourne, and spinning motherfucking backfist punches.

Not convinced? Watch this scene and tell me you don't want your own messenger robot:

I can only hope that this is a glimpse of what email is going to be like in the year 3000. Fly me to the future, Doc.

(via Transbuddha)

Awesome Van Ads


Word to the late great Matt Foley, this gallery is a totally fresh, retro craptacular jive fest for your cross country 70's party pleasure. Imagine what the fuzzy haired dreamers in these ads would have thought of their likenesses being on "the internet".
There are some gems in here. I tried really hard to find a shot of the back-of-the-van pervert curtains (aka "pervtains") but had no luck...So I had to settle on some sweet Thrush action:


Check out the whole amazing gallery HERE...

Burka Pac Man


You might as well laugh because I'm totally going to Hell.

Help, My Hulkamania Is Acting Up Again


Talk about a mind wipe. Terry "My cocaine and steroids habit make me confused and impulsive and agree to do ridiculous Japanese commercials" Hulk Hogan is all about singing to the children of Japan. This ad makes sense, because every scientist worth his salt knows that nothing soothes a child like the sight of a shirtless foreign gigantor with a handlebar mustache singing in a language they don't understand.

Someone pass me a towel. It seems I've clawed my eyes and ears again.

Harbinger of Spring

The other day, while listening to the radio I heard Julie Zickefoose say that her favorite spring bird was the woodcock.

Ha. She said woodcock.

But then she kept on going about how much she loves to see a “darling little woodcock” and how she trys “not to giggle as it struts about” and a far too many other sexual innuendos to name here. I kept listening hoping she would say whether or if she enjoys stroking a good woodcock.

She never did. Take a listen yourself to the audio clip and tell me it’s not downright hilarious and disgusting how luridly she describes the “woodcock.”

(Skip ahead to the 1:10 mark)

If drugs were legal...

would we have situations like this?

Goatse Ads

OK, so this is either an advertising industry event (no need to diguise that everyone in it is an arse) or a company that is not trying to sugar-coat how it feels about its employees and what it’s like to work there.


Tuesday, April 10, 2007

Picture Of The Day


Had to share, even though Easter is a memory. If only to display the spectacular front butt.

The Impossible Kid Kicks Serious Ass


Holy crap. Holy shit. Holy fucking crapshit. This is a amazing fight. Talk about spectacular. Imagine if you could shrink Bruce Lee, make him born in the Phillipines, and film him doing his dirty with the high quality film technique of a Cynthia Rothrock project. Then add some crap, add a little more, and throw in some boss sauce for good measure. Ouila! You have strange foreign karate perfection. Watch this little pimp bastard dole out some dojo dynamite. If only I could get Deep Roy and Little Superstar to return my calls. We could finally get my unnamed midget kung fu musical project up and running...

Baby Got Back- Gilbert And Sullivan Style


God/Jesus/Crom/Illuminati Overlords/Robot King From Outer Space, this is so fucking brilliant. Internet, you're so sexy it hurts.

(via Neatorama)

There's Two of Them

Meet Lech Kaczyński,

He's the president of Poland and a simple man with a simple mission, help Poland return to it's glory days of old. So far he's been pretty successful too. He helped form a new political party in Poland (the Prawo i Sprawiedliwość) which helped him win the election.

Now, meet Jarosław Kaczyński,

He's the Prime Minster of Poland and a simple man with a simple mission, help Poland return to it's glory days of old. So far he's been pretty...

Ok, hold the phone. There is some thing about those pictures. Oh, there's the problem, the president and the prime minister of Poland are in identical twin brothers from an uber-nationalistic political party that they co-founded. Here is a rare picture of them together at a state function.

Uber-nationalism has never been so uber-creepy. I just can't believe that there isn't a sitcom based on this exact scenario yet. "The President Trap" staring Mary Kate and Ashley. We're entering a brave new world where even television fears to tread.

Alls I know is that these guys are staying in power until the only two men who have the balls to take them on step up.

Monkey(s) For Helping!


Well my fine friends, indeed the time has come. For many moons I have slapped my simian paws on these dusty keys, providing you with tray after tray of bite-sized stupid sandwiches to feast upon. And now the day is upon me.. the day any monkey for helping must face. It is time to find others of my kind.

It's like the old timers always monkey is not enough. So I have decided to call forth four others to help me in our mission. From now on, Monkeys For Helping will truly be plural.

So please welcome to the M4H team The Unbeatable Kid, SleepONE, Mr. J, and The Mantis!

So from now on, you'll see more posts, more variety, and much more stupid.

Monkeys For Helping:
We're like just Voltron, except instead of robots, we're internet nerds.

Conservative Facial Hair


Breezy Jesus is officially my new rap name. Holla.

Malibu: The Most Bodacious Gladiator


Ok, who remembers American Gladiators? What a show! Truly a yin and yang of awful and awesome. I remember watching it and wondering why I wasn't changing the channel. It was gloriously underwhelming, like looking at a magic eye poster and finally seeing the picture. But something about watching coked up WWF rejects at gymnastics camp hit each other with giant Q-tips is strangely fascinating.

Check out Malibu's homage to Bill and Ted and Jeff Spicoli. The guy couldn't be anymore 80's Cali if he was listening to Poison and rollerskating in jean shorts on Venice Beach.

(via M&C)

4-Story Donkey Kong Ala Post-It


It took a lot of nerds a lot of time and energy to make this. But it was definitely worth it. I'd have to hook up a flux capacitor to Stephen Hawking's robot brain to get something half as cool. Check out how they did it HERE.

(via Boing Boing)