Tuesday, September 13, 2005

Steven Seagal's Lightning Bolt

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Like it or not, Steven Seagal is a cultural icon. Some call him a poor man's Jackie Chan, others a rich man's Jean Claude Van Damme. I like to think of him as being in a league of his own. And in a world of one-trick pony action stars, he's truly a Renaissance man.

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(Steven Seagal: Panda lover, guitar shredder, face destroyer)

No one does violence like Steven Seagal. And his movie lines are tremendous. Some of his masterful movie moments:

From Hard To Kill:

Senator Vernon Trent:
"You can take that to the bank!"

Seagal: "I'm gonna take you to the bank, Senator Trent. To the blood bank!"

From Marked For Death:

Drug Dealer: "Hey, you want some blow?"

Seagal: "Yeah, I want some blow. Put your hands where I can see 'em or I'm gonna blow your head off."

Also from Marked For Death:

Seagal: "You bailed out a Jamaican street named Monkey the other day, I want him. This other piece of shit, Screwface, I want him. I know you're a scumbag and a puke, I don't mind that, but give me what I need and I'll leave here a nice guy. If you don't, I'm gonna fuck you up."

No that's poetry. All I know is I learned how to break peoples arms in several different ways watching his movies, and any guy who kills the final bad guy by stabbing a knife into the top of their head is a winner to me. No matter how bad his movies are, I'll always have a place in my heart for him.

And now, after all his life's accomplishments, Steven Seagal has gone the Lil' Jon route and created his own energy Drink. Forget Red Bull. It's all about

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(Click to feel the power!)

From the website: Lightning Bolt Energy Drink™ is the result of Seagal’s travels in Asia in search of the ingredients believed to keep many locals disease-free for life. Seagal says he discovered the benefits of Asian Cordyceps (one of the most rare and treasured herbs used in Chinese and Tibetan medicine for thousands of years) while researching immune builders in Asia. They promote energy, vitality and longevity. Other unique ingredients of the drink include the Tibetan Goji Berry, a powerful anti-oxidant, patented process cane juice concentrate which contain naturally occurring policosanols. Policosanols have been found to lower cholesterol. Lightning Bolt is the first energy drink made from 100% juice, all natural with no sugar added and also contains B3, B6, B12 and B5.

“I have traveled the world creating this drink; there is none better that I know ” says Seagal, who frequented Tibet and Japan in the 1960s and 1970s while learning Buddhism and martial arts. “I have included in this drink everything I could to strengthen the body.”

Lightning Bolt is truly a new generation of Gourmet Energy Drink due to the appealing taste and health benefits.

Whatever, all that is nonsense to me. But if it makes me an arm-breaking killing machine, I'll take a case!!! Oh man, I can't wait for the commercials for this!!!

(via linkfilter)

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