Thursday, April 27, 2006

Picture Of The Day

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I can't tell you how many times I've been out drinking with friends and wanted to do this to them..

C For Cookie

Sesame Street meets the Wachowski brothers "V For Vendetta". Cookie Monster is the man, I'm glad they didn't use Big Bird as the main character. (Don't know why, but I totally hate that yellow bastard.) And Oscar the Grouch is a perfect choice for Big Brother. Even though he lived in a trash can, everyone knows he totally ran shit on the Sesame block...



(via Screenhead)

Tactical Ice Cream Unit

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This is so cool. ice cream and activism..a match made in heaven. Quote from Eyebeam Reblog:

"The Tactical Ice Cream Unit, a project of the Center for Tactical Magic, distributes ice cream but also information at a time when most channels of distribution, communication, and social interaction are mediated and constrained by the fervor of financial exchange.

Divided into a "mother ship" (Central Command Van) and a "scout" (Tactical Ice Cream Cart), the TICU harbors surveillance devices including a 12-camera video surveillance system, acoustic amplifiers, GPS, satellite internet, a media transmission studio capable of disseminating live audio/video, and ice cream. With every free ice cream handed out, people are also handed out printed information developed by local progressive groups. The TICU's surveillance suite provides grassroots access to mobile communications technologies to produce independent community news or to monitor such "un-American" activities as corporate dumping or police brutality."

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(Click pic for more!)

Jeff Goldblum: King of Scat



I don't know much. But one thing I do know is that the Blum is fucking King. I'd like to loop this and use computers to make an infectious house beat out of it. I really think I'd have the next "Cotton Eyed Joe" on my hands. Guaranteed platinum status overnight.

Abstract Caricatures

I'm really digging these abstract caricatures by Omar Figueroa Turcios. Like this one of Brazilian soccer Jedi Ronaldo:


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(Click pic for gallery!)

(via J-Walk)

Pirate Baby's Cabana Battle Street Fight 2006

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If you like the animation above, you gotta check out Pirate Baby's Cabana Battle Street Fight 2006, a new video game-inspired animation created by Aussie artist Paul Robertson that has to be seen to believed. Check it out below, broken into 2 parts, or watch the whole thing HERE...

Part 1



Part 2




Pretty cool, huh?

(via Joystiq)

Tuesday, April 25, 2006

Picture Of The Day

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Run for your lives, kids.

(via Attu)

The Spirit Of Truth

Thanks to the power of myspace friends, I have been blessed with this amazing video. And after watching it all the way through I am now a believer. Maybe it's the uber-insane potty mouth or the retro "Land of The Lost" backdrop. Maybe it's the kung fu camera zoom. Or maybe its the fact that George Clinton's "One Nation Under a Groove" can be heard in between the beautiful bursts of God laden profanity. Whatever it is, I want more.



(Thanks Drew!)

Hot Chicks With Douchebags

This is a truly great idea for a blog. I just really hope we get to see the Lee Hotti guys on it, as they are without a doubt the reigning kings of douche.

I hope this site does well, I really like it. All the author has to do is bring a digital camera to the Jersey Shore on any given weekend and he'll literally have years worth of material...


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(Click Dbag for more!)


Gnarls Barkley "Crazy" Video

The Cee-lo/Dangermouse project Gnarls Barkley has an album coming out May 9th I'm definetely picking up..Their single "Crazy" has been burning up my ipod for the last few weeks, and this video for it is so so dope.



PS: Here's a download link for the mp3 because I love you all from the bottom of my tar-covered nerd heart.

UFO Bible Art

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Let me start this post off by telling you all (if you don't already know) that I am a huge paranormal buff, and absolutely love reading about aliens, past lives, astral projection, time travel and all the variations and flavors of conspiracy on the net from Icke to Rense to Coast To Coast to Infowars..I eat it up. Can't get enough of the stuff.

Now I've personally seen a UFO, and am a believer. And there are some ancient works of art that exist that contains anomalies that could be seen as UFO's..But believing that the greys rocked out with Jesus Crizzle himself back in the day is a whole other story all together.

Artist and self-proclaimed abductee Monarca Lynn Merrifield makes paintings depicting Extra Terrestrials in biblical times. Take a look at her gallery and her site which has lots of intertesting links on it..Take it with a grain of salt, but some of these paintings are awesome, and worth checking out..(Scroll down for gallery)


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(Click pic for more!)

(via WFMU)

Elevator Body Slam

In light of yesterday's old lady face smashing post that people seemed to enjoy, here's a classic that remains one of my all time favorite clips. Watch this fucker get powerbombed after failing to snatch this ninja lady's purse. Boom.


Monday, April 24, 2006

Picture Of The Day

soothing

Somehow this is both soothing and disturbing simultaneously. Kind of like watching Bob Ross paint happy trees while listening to his baby petter voice...

Wicked Lady Punch

Pow! Old lady grill smashing is so hot right now. After watching this 20 times, I'm still hooked. Nothing about this gets old.


Break Machine - Street Dance

If I could move like this I'd have to wear a painter's smock because I'd constantly be throwing up on myself from vertigo caused by my own awesomeness. Popping, locking, Adidas, old school electro: these are a few of my favorite things.


Earth As Art

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This is a dope gallery of images taken of Earth from the Landsat-7 satellite - and most recently, the Terra Satellite's Advanced Spaceborne Thermal Emission and Reflection Radiometer (ASTER). Some of these are amazing..like this pic of the Anti-Atlas Mountains, part of the Atlas Mountain range in southern Morocco, Africa...

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(Click pic for the gallery!)


RPG fishing

If you were wondering where your tax dollars were going, check this out..American soldiers doing some rocket launcher trout fishing in Afghanistan...




(via Hedonistica)

Friday, April 21, 2006

Hynotize Gif Power

Have a good weekend, people. But before I go, I leave you with this question..Out of these three great men, who has the most hypnotizing power?

Infinite Walken

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Infinite Picard

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Or Infinite Hoff?

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FYI: Posting this gave me a wicked headache. LOL I'm just begging for negative internet traffic with this one.

Thursday, April 20, 2006

Picture Of The Day

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Son of Jor-El, your pimp hand is strong indeed.

(thanks Gabe!)

Come Again? El Principe Gitano: In The Ghetto

Jesus in a sequined jumpsuit. Never has the English language been butchered so beautifully. As I laugh out loud, somewhere is Memphis Elvis is rolling in his grave.

Coffins From Ghana

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This is a interesting collections of artistic coffins from Ghana. From the site:

"For the Ga tribe in coastal Ghana, funerals are a time of mourning, but also of celebration. The Ga people believe that when their loved ones die, they move on into another life and the Ga make sure they do so in style. They honor their dead with brightly colored coffins that celebrate the way they lived.

The coffins are designed to represent an aspect of the dead person's life. Such as a car if they were a driver, a fish if their livelihood was the sea or a sewing machine for a seamstress. They might also symbolize a vice such as a bottle of beer or a cigarette."

Check these out, some are really cool..

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(click pic for more!)

Thai Midget Kickboxing

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Just think..somewhere out there Thai midgets are fighting to the edge of death for your amusement. So smile a happy smile,
because this life is truly wonderful.


The Evils Of Marijuana

In light of it being 4/20, I thought I'd share one of my favorite anti-marijuana vids from the Nixon era: "The Evils Of Marijuana". I've seen some good propaganda in my time, but this is just fucking brilliant. There are some classic samples in it. I was completely hooked and fiending for more after the opening line.."Forget it man, and get with the countdown. Shake this square world and blast off for kicksville!"

Damn fucking straight. Kicksville ain't ready.


Wednesday, April 19, 2006

Picture Of The Day

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Serious Jedi pwnage.

Santo vs. Dangerdoom

Some internet super cool guy took the fantastic Dangerdoom/ Ghostface collabo "The Mask" and made a video for it featuring the king pimp of Latin American luchadors, Santo. It kinda reminds me of Ghost's Speed Racer-inspired Daytona 500 video. Regardless, this is so dope I wish I could crush it up and sniff it.

Tuesday, April 18, 2006

Picture Of The Day

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Average Homeboy

Wow wow wow I really can't stop watching this video. Meet "Average Homeboy", a pioneer in world of Caucasian hip hop. Whether you get hooked on the intensely wack beat or AH's shockingly awful lyrical flow, I guarantee you will feel a strange burning sensation inside your skull after watching this. Even on mute this video rocks the bells because dude looks like a north jersey zamboni driver from 1983. But don't take my word for it, listen to the golden words of Average Homeboy: "Once you hear my audio demo, you'll just be blazed!"

Jesus bloody Christ.



(thanks Toby!)

Japanese Beauty Products

Not surprisingly, strange things are afoot in Japan. This is a collection of odd products designed to improve your appearance. A great link for all your cosmetic needs..neck stretching, leg shaping, and the perfect place to get rid of that pesky case of fat mouth:

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Slim Mouth Piece

"The Slim Mouthpiece will finally do the job right if your're still having problems with the fat on the sides of your mouth. Place the device on the corners of your mouth and begin to repeat the 5 vowels until you feel the burn. The mouthpiece also contains a removable spring in which you can upgrade the resistance."

Really, Japan..WTF.

Check out all the products HERE...


Controller 7: -Ex-Telest

Not sure if I posted this before..no matter, I think it's the coolest music video of all time. I'm really not sure if it was filmed back in the day or not..All I know is the kids got the fresh moves.


Monday, April 17, 2006

Picture Of The Day

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Illest poker face EVER.

Starcrash!!

"You are about to be hurled through the blackness of a hundred million nights..into the farthest reaches of space and time!!" ROFL!! This movie looks absolutely perfect. Check out the magnificent 1979 George Lucas-raping "Star Crash", an Italian masterpiece starring a fresh faced David Hasslehoff. That's right, the fucking Hoff is in it.
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(fig. a: Young Hassleheezy as "Prince Simon")

Check out this flick, it rivals Turkish Star Wars in production values and Citizen Kane in awesomeness..




(via M&C)

kick like kung fu flicks by run run shaw

The Shaw brothers are the shit. They created classics like 36th Chamber of Shaolin, the Five Venoms, and The One Armed Swordsman. Without these guys, Kill Bill would have sucked and Wu-Tang clan's first album would have been alot more minimal.

Check out this unbelievable gallery of all the Shaw Brothers posters. They have so many movies! This is a veritable trove of kung fu fan boy nerd treasure. I could spend hours on this site...And now I have three more flicks to add to my "must see" list:

"The Oily Maniac"

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"Scandalous Warlord"

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The Super Inframan"

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Fan fucking tastic. Check out the gallery HERE.


(via Geisha Asobi)

Acupuncturist's Chi Powers

Ok, jedis actually exist. And they do accupuncture. (shout out to Victor!) After over 20 years of daily meditation, this guy can shock people and light newspaper on fire with his Chi. Watch this amazing video...




Sunday, April 16, 2006

Jesus day!

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Oh Snap! It's Easter! Happy Jesus day people. You know what that means..time for Jesus dress up! Classic.

Yes keyboard brethren, I know I've been slacking on the geek tip, I promise this week will be full of nerdful goodery... And here's some blasphemy to hold you over till then.




PS: I wish this guy could sing me an Easter song as magically shitty as his Christmas song...


Wednesday, April 12, 2006

Some gifs for you

School is brutal this week, and I don't have much time to post today..So here are some stupid GIF's to distract you..see you tomorrow..

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[ani] cop vs ninjas

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And my personal favorite..

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Tuesday, April 11, 2006

Picture Of The Day

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All hail Chuck. These slacks are perfect for years of roundhouse action.

Press Your Luck Jedi

Who remembers Press Your Luck? I used to loooooove that show. From the electronic arpeggios to the frantic whammy gambling, I couldn't get enough.

In 1984 an Ohio man put together an astounding run on the show by memorizing the sequences by which the various prize squares lit up on the game board, allowing him to time his button presses to coincide with the lights' stopping on the most advantageous squares.

By hitting 35 such squares in a row, he was able to accumulate the largest win in the history of that show, and he did it all in under an hour.



Top 20 Strangest Gadgets and Accessories

This is a cool list of odd gadgets. Some really great stuff on the list like talking Japanese watches, gas powered blenders, and my personal favorite, cardboard speakers:

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(Click pic for more gadgets!)

The Hall of Panflutists

Panflute is the bomb. Well actually I think it's the absolute worst, but people who play it have a special place in my heart. Like Zamfir for one. I hear he's got crazy beef with Yanni and John Tesh's crew. He's like the 50 Cent of shitty new age music.

Anyway, this is an amazing gallery of Panflutists complete with links to their sites, because I just know you are itching for some panflute joints to rock on your ipods.

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Click pic for more!


Weird Fortune Cookies

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One time I opened a fortune cookie and it was empty inside. I've been convinced I have an ancient Chinese hex on me ever since.

I don't know about you, but I've seen some weird ones in my day. This is a collection of strange fortune cookies. Here are two of my favorites from the site:

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Check out the rest HERE...

Thursday, April 06, 2006

Asshole Battle:Tournament Of Champions!

Several M4H readers have mentioned to me that it's time for another asshole battle. So I decided it's finally time to find out which asshole reigns supreme. This one has been years in the making.

I've taken the winner of each asshole battle from the past, and brought them here one last time to see who is grand king of the douchebags. I've also added a few others to spice up the competition. You know the rules, tell us who you think is the biggest asshole and why. The contender with the most votes wins the asshole crown and the glory of immortality within the halls of douchebaggery. So, I ask you all the question...

Who is the biggest Asshole?


#1: The Cobra Kai dojo Guy From Karate Kid


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Martin Kove, who played the evil leader of the Cobra Kai dojo was t
he suprising winner of the first asshole battle back in March '05, stealing the crown from favorite William Atherton (Ghostbusters Asshole.) His in-your-face rebellion against sleeves and relentless obsession with maiming Ralph Macchio made him the clear winner over Atherton. We'll see how he fares in today's battle royale.

#2: Christopher Mcdonald

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Shooter McGavin eats pieces of shit for breakfast.
Christopher Mcdonald's role in Happy Gilmore landed him the victory in the June battle in '05, reigning supreme over Paul Gleason (the asshole in the Breakfast Club) and Ronny Cox (evil assshole Vilos Cohaggen in Total Recall). He's got a strong chance in the competition, we'll see if he's enought of an dickweed to secure a second victory in today's battle. Best asshole line: "Damn you people. Go back to your shanties." What a cockbag.

#3: Dick Cheney

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The mighty Dick won the most recent battle, beating out Billy Zane in Titanic and even managed to defeat the godamned Emperor from Star Wars. This guy is such an asshole when he smiles it looks like he's being punched in the cock and balls. Some might think he has some serious competition today, but the fact that he recently blasted a senior citizen in the face with a fucking shotgun makes him a strong contender. We'll see if it gives him enought of an edge to secure victory.

So there you have the past champions. But just for shits and giggles, here are a few more contenders to spice things up:

#4: Jeffrey Jones

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Best known as the mega-douche principal Ed Rooney in Ferris Bueller's Day Off, Jeff Jeezy has made a career out of playing shmarmy weasels and dickheads in almost every film he's ever been in. And he rocks the Tom Skerritt dickhead mustache to evil perfection. *Super Asshole bonus points: He's a bonafide baby petter in real life.

#5: Russell Crowe

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He claims that he never wants to fight again, but I don't buy it. I just have a hunch that anyone who throws telephones at bell boys is no bush league asshole. This guy is a real contender for the crown. For christ sakes, Sesame Street rejected this guy! You have to be a real dick to get dissed by muppets. I bet he totally wanted to fuck up Big Bird after that.

#6: The "Mao!" guy from Deer Hunter

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I included this little bastard because he is only famous for slapping people in the mouth and making them play Russian fucking Roulette. I was so gassed when Deniro put his thing down on this guy. This man is an Uber-asshole. In fact, he's my pick to win the whole competition.

#7: Tom Cruise

tom-cruise-oprah

Finally, we have Tommy Scientology. '05 and '06 have been stellar years in asshole achievements for this little guy. He dissed psychiatry, called Matt Lauer "glib", and viciously attacked Oprah Winfrey with L. Ron Hubbard powered demon electricity. Always the multi-tasker, he somehow managed to find time along the way to devour Katie Holmes' soul and begin creating his hellspawn army of soulless Tominites.

So there you have it, people. Get out there and make your voices heard. I hope to see alot of you step up and rock the vote. This is the final round! So let the games begin!

Wednesday, April 05, 2006

Picture Of The Day

asimo

Introducing Honda Asimo: Peppers edition.
*Warning: Not safe for children or adults.*


The Easter Bunny Hates You

The Easter bunny is by far the wackest of all holiday mascots. Not even chocolate makes up for the fact that a giant shitty rabbit gave it to you. I always hated him, and I really never knew why. But after watching this awesome video I think I now know: He's a total douche bag.



(thanks Kuru!)

MacGuyver on "Lost"

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Reason #4,563 Why Spanish TV Is The Best



Ay, Dios Mio.


Hip Mario Schwag

Old-school Nintendo is the bizness. If you're anything like me, you'll find these two novelty items amazingly neccesary for your continued nerd existence. First, check out these Super Mario stamps from Japan...Cool, huh? They really work, too. I wish I had a Japanese pen pal. Anyone in Japan reading this, hook a monkey up!

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(click pic for more! (in Japananse))


And if you are looking for the perfect gift to mail to me, here it is. It's a "Grow Your Own 1up Mushroom Kit." I don't eat mushrooms, but I would totally rock this fucker as a center piece in my living room.

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(Click pic to buy!)


(links via ODK and Thinkgeek)