Tuesday, October 27, 2009

MC Trebek in the Hizzouse

Hanging out with Recon this weekend, we were both enjoying Steve Porter's follow up to the Slap Chop remix called "Press Hop." It's good, especially if you're a sports fiend like me (the autotuning of Namath's drunken, nationally televised sexual harrassment alone is worth the price of admission). But as I was getting ready to post the "Press Hop" video, my mind was officially blown by something even MORE amazing: MC Trebek. Since this Tronovich treat is way more up M4H's alley, I thought I'd bless the blog with the smooth stylings of one Alex "Make it Rain" Trebek. Thank you internets.


Thursday, October 22, 2009

Picture Of The Day

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Speaking of the future, I'm pretty sure this guy just robbed a gas station 10 years from now. He's like a Nascar driver from Beyond Thunderdome. And yes, if you were wondering, drunk driving is A-OK in post Nuclear war wastelands. As long as you show the future police your wolf hat, you're as good as gold. Laser Gold.

I want to email this guy a highfiveotron but something tells me he doesn't "do" computers.

Future, Much?

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Check out this super ridiculously Rad device called "The Courier" that Microsoft is releasing sometime during or near Armageddon times. Super tips of the laser hat to SleepONE for showing your humble nerd this amazing piece of amazingry. It reminds me of Sony's Japanese tile computer prototype. Honestly, I'll take either.
I'd just need to install one of those plastic guards they put near gross buffets in case of face explosions.




Remind me again: how is it that we can't control the weather yet? All I'm saying is we need to get on that shit. Science it up, Science! I swear, if it rains on me again while on my way to work and I puddle-rape my Nike's one more time, I'm going to save up my terrible salary for R&D to design a robot that challenges clouds to fistfights.

Yes, I fucking hate rain. Hate it like fat kids don't hate cake.

And once they're done punching all the clouds in the face, I'll command them to systematically hunt down all the weathermen who think it's all good to tell me to "bundle up" and pack some rain gear while they exchange chuckles over coffee with their brick-faced colleagues, mocking my inevitable misery from their warm, dry TV studio with their bone-white giant teeth and dead mannequin eyes. Smile now, pay later, Mr. Weatherperson. Lock those doors, Smiley. They're coming for you. And when they do, I can guarantee a 75% chance of you getting a robot kick inside your giant watermelon-sized face.

Monday, October 19, 2009

The different kinds of strangers



The lesson I learned: Avoid all human beings. I also realized how important it is to never overindulge in the use of Starwipes. Unless you're the assistant manager of a black-ops supersoldier brain washing project, one a minute should be enough for most films.

(via blort)

Booooo Shuda.

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This dauber is my kind of scum. Fearless and inventive.

Mr. Baracus, you have the floor.




WORD.





LIFE.

Thank Satan, it's Monday!

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Saturday, October 17, 2009

Always RSVP to a Chuck Norris party invitation.

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Poor manners are frowned upon, and Chuck Norris frowns with karate kicks.

Lose the forks, Luke

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Toad It Up



Give the drummer some. Seriously, this guy is so good that for a minute there I was convinced that gold coins would pour out of the bricks in my apartment if I could just ram my head into them hard enough.

Saturday, October 10, 2009

Bobby J: Number One


Nevermind that he looks like the steroid dealer for the 1986 Chicago Bears. Bobby J is fucking CEO of the International Boss Corporation. Watching Mr. J's constant Gormley-esque Powerstancing and his unique brand of reluctant mandancery, I feel like Harry Hamlin fighting Medusa in 'Clash of the Titans'. God he's cool. He's like the last Boss on the NES game you never finished because after a while you got so sick of trying to beat him you decided that the game was too hard and just said "Fuck it" and spent the rest of the afternoon burning your frontal lobes out watching cartoons sitting too close to the TV eating ice cream until your face hurt.



I want to crush him up, sniff him, check myself into rehab for awesome addiction, then get pretentious and preachy about it when other people tell me they have a grip on their Bobby J habit.


(Thanks Antonio!)

Tuesday, October 06, 2009

Picture Of The Day


Umm, careful dudes. That fucking Tiger is no joke. Even Poseidon looks scared. And he's fucking POSEIDON.

Carl Sagan's 'A Glorious Dawn' Feat. MC Steve Hawking




This year Jay-Z declared Autotune dead. Naturally, only true Gods of Science and Laser Magic could take it, resurrect it, and bring it to another level. A very, very nerdy level.

My hypothesis: This is what my television would sound like if it got high.

Misters Belvederes


Sorry, I couldn't help but share this. I know it's awful. It's like a still from an Aphex Twin video remix of my childhood. But I've been (re) watching the classic "New Blood on Falcon Turf" I posted many moons ago featuring a guest appearance from the older brother from Mr. Belvedere, and I've had a brutal case of chronic Belvederitis I can't seem to shake ever since. So if you haven't yet seen it, please, go ahead and share my misery. Don't worry, it's really, really good. I wouldn't lie to you.*



(*Except this once.)

Sunday, October 04, 2009

Rippin' The Pit, We've Got It All..



This is like the Citizen Kane of 1980's Californian Boogie Board culture. Judging from the flickery production values, it actually plays more like a terrorist recruitment tape...but I for one am drinking the Kool-Aid and strapping on my wrap-around Oakleys like the good bleach blonde, wave-carving automaton I hope to become one day.

If only Daniel had rolled with these kids he never would have had to fight those Cobra Kai alone.

(via Rad Dudes)

Thursday, October 01, 2009

Star Trek Picture of the Day



Remember that episode where Mr. Data got tired of the Captain's "make is so" sass mouth and decided to deploy the choke slam? That was awesome.